We kinda knew this was going to happen at the Tour de France.
What’s “this” you ask?
I bet you already know.
Tadej Pogačar casually dismantling the Tour de France before we’ve even unpacked our July.
Here’s a quick timeline of how I bet your Tour de France Emotional Journey has gone, from January to present day.
April: Jonas is healthy and he’s confirmed for the Tour! The Boys are Back in Townnnnnn!
Stage 1: I’ve been waiting all year for the Tadej vs. Jonas show. My popcorn is ready. Let’s gooo.
Stage 1-3: Nothing too crazy going down. I’m kinda liking this. Tadej isn’t playing every card yet.
Stage 4: Oh no. He wins 3 jerseys in on one day. I forgot that could even be a thing???
Also Stage 4: I also thought the GC showdown was going to be a bit later?? I’m confused. WTF is going on. This Tour cannot be over on Stage 4.
Stage 5-9: Wellll here we go. The Tour is looking awfully boring. I know the mountain stages are heading our way but… it’s not looking good. It’s looking like another one-man show. Maybe I’ll just watch Love Island instead.
It’s not exactly a secret that the Tour is starting to shape up to be a little of a snooze fest with Tadej doing well, exactly what he does – drop the most dominant riders in the peloton to win. So I took the liberty upon myself to draft up a quick survival guide for us all as we cope with what could be a dreadfully boring Tour de France.
1. Get way too invested in the other sub-jerseys
You heard it here folks: the other jerseys are cool as hell and it’s worth tracking all the crazy points. Who’s in polka now? Who’s snagging green? This Tour we have a major green jersey contender out of commission, and each day it feels like a toss up between Kaden Groves, Jonathan Milan, or Tim Merlier of who can lead the sprint stages. And on top of that, there’s very few points between the climbers and GC for points right now with Tadej behind Tim Wellens by just one point.
2. Rewatch all the stages of the women’s Giro you probably missed
This one may come off snarky but I promise it isn’t. The Giro d’Italia Women has been utterly incredible this year, but we’ve had nearly zero time to truly enjoy and consume it. Watch the Women’s Giro so you’re prepped for the Tour de France Femmes in August and know the hitters to watch. Also, it’s the purest antithesis to the “Tadej Wins Everything Fatigue” because the racing is far more dynamic and the winner is never quite as guaranteed as the men’s for their respective stages (doesn’t that sound like… so great?).
3. Listen to some podcasts
I swear this isn’t a plug to just listen to ours – for real. The cycling podcast scene is honestly too good now and there’s not even enough time in the day to listen to them all. But I’ve found they’re immensely helpful for finding the wild amount of gems that are missable during the racing or just a basic Instagram scroll.
4. Get nerdy and research the stages
I have found that when racing is boring, it’s exciting to just dive into some Tour de France history from yesteryear and learn what I can on the stages. Maybe binge an old classic movie or two from when racing wasn’t as boring or predictable. When was the last time you watched Slaying the Badger? Or if you’re over Unchained, The Least Expected Day is a killer multi-episode binge.
5. The craziest idea yet: Go for a bike ride
If you are bummed on the GC feeling “determined” – I would encourage you to spend your time ripping around on your own bike, versus moaning at the TV screen or complaining in the comments. There is no reason to hate the sport over Tadej’s wins – they’re remarkable and ground breaking in their own right and being a hater of them does no good for you or the sport. We’re all here trying to cope with this reality of the age of Tadej – of a singular rider so strong entire teams are still trying to figure out how to adequately compete with him.
6. Remember … the Tour hasn’t started yet
We all know this. But it’s not fun to remember it – but the Tour has not begun. We need the critical mountain stages to have any confidence in how this will shake out. Jonas has beat Tadej on in Stage 11 riding up the Col du Granon, and in Stage 18 as well up Hautacam. Never forget the demolition of Tadej that occurred of Stage 16 of the 2023 Tour where Jonas dropped him by 1:38 in the ITT. And, one of the hardest stages to ever watch them battle, when they fought on Col de la Luze and Tadej lost 6 minutes to Jonas where his GC hopes and dreams for that Tour were shattered.
Remember friends – it’s a long 21 days. We can do this. Stay strong and don’t lose hope for the battle to heat up more – in many ways it hasn’t even begun.